Liz & Matt
It was hard to pick favorites to share here from my time with these two amazing people. We got so many beautiful photos and captured such a special time in Liz & Matt's lives. We spent an hour together exploring Elizabeth Park, sharing stories and documenting their pregnancy.
These two have been married for 10 years, and together for 12. They shared with me their story, how they met, their journey through pregnancy and life together. It was truly beautiful to listen to them talk about each other. When Liz and I initially chatted about booking a maternity session, she shared with me that this would be her rainbow baby. I had no idea how special this session would be to me until weeks later. Liz and Matt had been trying for years to conceive. They had gone through IVF and finally got pregnant, and as you can probably imagine, they were immensely excited. Liz went in for her 7-week scan, and found out that they would be having TWINS. Weeks after her scan, she was in the hospital miscarrying. Liz and I talked about her experience through her miscarriage. What helped her, what didn't. She shared how hard it was for her and how important it was to have support through it all.
This session was so special to me because it gave me hope. At the time Liz and I initially spoke, I had just found out that I was pregnant. Although surprised, I was SO excited. I've always dreamed about being a mom and knew that it was part of who I am. This is the first time I'm sharing this publicly, so bear with me, this is an extremely vulnerable place for me to be in, but I felt it was time. My boyfriend, Chris, and I were so excited to be parents. We talked and talked for weeks about all of the things we had to look forward to, how amazing it would be to raise a human together. We were so blessed. I even went to my 8-week scan, and I got to see the little bean growing in my belly. How freaking beautiful. The female body truly is a miracle maker. It was so special to me. I had names picked out, plans made, and so much I was looking forward to.
On the day of my first trimester screening, I had started to bleed. I was driving myself crazy google searching and trying to piece together what was happening. SO many women shared about how they bled during their pregnancy and were fine. I was fine...
... And then I wasn't. The ultrasound showed an empty uterus. There was no baby. I was having a miscarriage. It's honestly hard to relive those feelings by typing this, but it's part of the healing process. Thank you for being here. I could have never been prepared for the experience that I went through while I was miscarrying, and the process I went through after. It truly is something I don't wish upon ANYONE. If you're reading this and you've had a miscarriage or any form of child loss, you are not alone. I see you.
I had heard stories about miscarriage, family members and friends who had miscarried, and so many people warned me. They told me to be prepared. "You know it's especially common to lose your first pregnancy, right?" Some people told me not to tell anyone about the pregnancy for a while, "just in case." You want to know something? I wouldn't have changed a thing I did or said in the time that I was pregnant. I would have told all of the same people. I would have tried over and over again to remind myself that everything was going to be okay, despite what others were telling me. Because, it was okay. It didn't feel okay at first, but deep down I knew it would feel okay eventually. It was shitty. I was sad, so freaking sad. I wanted to run away. I cried, a lot. I felt the entire range of human emotion, and I was honest with myself through it all. As honest as I could be.
The most important part of getting through to the other side? Love and support. Being open and talking about it with people who care about me, especially people who would just listen. People who wouldn't try to convince me that it wasn't my time or that it all happened for a reason (I knew this, deep down, I knew it was happening for a reason, but I didn't fully believe it yet). Being true to myself about what I was feeling was really important for me, too. Not pretending I was fine when I wasn't. This helped me a lot, honesty with myself, no matter what that meant.
If you're still here, thank you for reading part of my story. I didn't think I would be sharing this right now, but I am.
This session with Liz and Matt gave me hope. Talking to Liz about her experience made me feel less alone. Hearing her story and sharing my own gave me strength. I'm really truly SO grateful to be able to meet people like Liz and Matt, and I believe that every person I come across is put in my life at the perfect moment and for the perfect reason. Their rainbow baby is due in October / September and I have so much faith that their baby boy will have a happy, healthy delivery. I can feel it.
I hope that their story gives you hope, too. In life, in love, in faith, in believing, and especially in knowing that you're never alone. Sometimes part of healing journey is being courageous enough to share your story, in hopes that it inspires another. Thank you to Liz and Matt for giving me the chance to share your story, and also my own.
As always, scroll down to see more of the photos we captured during our time together.
So so so much love,